


The Stillness of Remembering

by malaxandrite



Series: Brothers All [5]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Clone Trooper Reconditioning (Star Wars), Episode: s01e16 The Hidden Enemy, Fix-It, Force-Sensitive Clone Troopers (Star Wars), Identity Issues, Memory Loss, No Beta We Die Like Clones, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovered Memories, Slick got reconditioned and sent to the Nova Corps
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-12 03:55:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29378835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/malaxandrite/pseuds/malaxandrite
Summary: CT-8008 has decided to call the mystery vod in his dreams prudii’verd. Shadow-soldier. He doesn’t really understand how he knows the words, he doesn’t recall any of his trainers on Kamino speaking Mando’a, but he doesn’t dwell on it. In all honesty, it’s the least concerning thing happening to him right now.
Relationships: Slick & Original Clone Trooper Character(s)
Series: Brothers All [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2114940
Kudos: 10





	The Stillness of Remembering

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to write about Slick so I did
> 
> Mando'a Translations in the end notes
> 
> the title is from "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac

CT-8008 wakes suddenly, a scream lodged in his throat. He swallows it down and holds his shaking hands in front of his face. His fingers twitch like the flickering of flames. He watches them until his breathing slows down and he can hear something other than his pulse in his ears. 

It’s still his sleep cycle, CT-8008 thinks, as he listens to the snores of his squadmates. The chrono over the barracks door says it’s a little over half an hour until they have to get up. CT-8008 sighs, there’s no point in trying to fall back to sleep now, might as well get started with the day. 

As quietly as he can, CT-8008 gets a clean pair of blacks from his locker, along with his toiletry kit, and heads to the ‘fresher. 

Under the lukewarm spray of the shower, CT-8008 allows himself to think about the dreams. Of the distorted narrative his sleeping mind has come up with; the vod he sees, the vod he _becomes_. Some of it seems so real, the feel of his blaster in his hand, the smell of smoke on the battlefield. If he was older, CT-8008 would think he was drawing on his own experiences to create the dream scenarios, but he’s only just off Kamino, the only “battle” he’s seen was a three-day skirmish between Argon Company and some scavengers trying to loot an abandoned Republic base. 

But some part of him can’t shake the feeling that the dreams are real. That this brother lived, and fought, and probably died out on some battlefield. It’s always the same one, he’s noticed. At least his mind has come up with a coherent narrative for his dreams. The vod’s plates are blank, but he’s surrounded by troopers in 212th colors, and the others address him as sergeant. But, CT-8008 still doesn’t know the vod’s name, if he even has one. 

CT-8008 doesn’t have the dreams every night, but it’s often enough that he’s starting to worry about them. They aren’t bad dreams, per say, last night’s had just been of the vod playing sabacc with his squad, but he’d still woken up with his heart jackhammering in his chest and his body covered in a thin layer of cold sweat. It isn’t normal, CT-8008 knows, but like hells is he going to say anything about it. Strange dreams are a death sentence for a clone. 

The timer on the shower runs out and the water shuts off, pulling CT-8008 from his thoughts. Slinging a threadbare towel around his waist he goes to stand in front of the sinks. He shaves, and touches up the edges of his undercut. CT-8008 has recently made the decision to buzz the lower half of his head, giving himself something of a unique look among the thousands of identical soldiers in the 21st Nova Corps. It isn’t against regulations; and even if it was, CT-8008 doubts Command would do anything about it. General Mundi is how CT-8008 thinks a forgetful grandfather might act like. He doesn’t really have the presence of mind to care about the little things they do unless they cause problems. Their not-padawan seems to care even less, seemingly happy to be around people who aren’t Jedi. And the Marshal Commander…well, he can’t say anything because he’s a mutie, a double at that, hair _and_ eyes—which is _fine_ —but it means he’d be a hypocrite if he reprimanded them for branching out with their appearance. 

Staring at his reflection, CT-8008 tries not to focus on how the haircut makes him look exactly like the brother in his dreams. 

When he gets back to the barracks people have already started to wake up. His squad sergeant, Spike, notices him on his way back to his bunk. 

“Hey, O’Eight,” he calls, referring to him by the name they’ve given him until he finds a “real” one. Whatever that means. “Where’d you go?” 

“Had to piss,” CT-8008 shrugs, voice gruff, “didn’t feel like going back to sleep.” Spike nods, and returns to latching his leg armor to his blacks. 

“Oh!” Spike calls, and CT-8008 turns from were he’d crouched down to put his kit back in his locker. “We’re on OPP today so make sure to wear your thermals.” CT-8008 nods.

“Yes, sir.”

* * *

Outer Perimeter Patrol, or OPP, as some of the more seasoned vode call it, is probably one of CT-8008’s least favorite duties out of the few he’s experienced since joining the Novas. Especially on Eredenn Prime. Argon company is gathered in the hangar, the floor dusted with a fine coating of snow, their captain attempting to give them directions over the howling wind. Luckily one of their lieutenants is smart enough to broadcast the information over the internal audio channel in their buckets. 

“…Copper squad, you’ll take the Southeast quadrant by the lake…” The captain says and Spike nods at the five other members of their squad. Once they’re dismissed, CT-8008 and the rest of Copper follow Spike to the speeders. 

“Okay,” Spike starts once they’re all there, “Newt you’ll be with Redd, Snap you’ll be with O’Eight, and Twig you’ll be with me. You all have your assignments, now find a speeder and get going.” All five of them snap into a salute, “yes, sir!” 

The Republic base on Eredenn Prime is situated in one of the only areas on the planet that can support plant life. Making it home to hardy firs and pines, and also allowing some smaller animals to nest during the warmer seasons. But it’s winter on Eredenn Prime, which means the trunks and spindly branches of the trees are encased in a layer of ice that won’t melt off until the next growing season. It gives the forests outside the base an eerie, haunted feel. 

CT-8008 and Snap, Copper squad’s medic, ride through the forest side-by-side, the only sound the whine of the speeder engines. The trees pass in a white and black blur, the lack of color making the whole planet look like someone’s put a grayscale filter over it. He and Snap approach their destination quickly, and pull back to a stop in front of a small hill dotted with frozen trees. Snap motions him closer and CT-8008 goes.

“We have four hours till shift change at the base of Mount Caris, about four kliks to the north. Should be an easy ride, but keep your heat vision on, just in case,” Snap explains. “You wanna take the lead on this one?” 

“Sure,” CT-8008 says, his pulsing kicking up at the opportunity to prove himself. CT-8008 is new enough to the Novas that his squadmates are still easing him into things. Through the part of him that’s insulted—he’s just as capable a trooper as them—CT-8008 is kind of glad for the lenience, Commander Bacara is known to have vode transferred for the slightest infraction. The Marshal Commander runs a tight ship, but the Novas are one of the most efficient battalions in the GAR, so CT-8008 has no complaints. 

CT-8008 starts up his engine again, nodding to Snap, who starts his as well, and they head off on their patrol route. Their patrol goes smoothly enough, nothing shows up on his HUD, and the only glimpses of life he gets through the heat vision filter is when he looks down at his hands. The mountain slowly gets closer, its figure looming over them, so tall they can’t see the top through the halo of clouds around it. 

CT-8008 loses himself in thought, more times that he can count, the plain landscape anything but attention keeping. The quiet reverie of the forest is broken by a low rumble that runs down the mountain to the valley they’re riding through. He pulls back to ride side-by-side with Snap. 

“Avalanche,” the medic says, watching the mountain. CT-8008 switches off his heat vision and zooms in on the mountain. A wave of snow and ice slides down from the peak toward the base. The sound grows louder, then louder still, and CT-8008’s vision starts to swim.

“We should comm Spike,” Snap says, not looking away from the avalanche. “Right, O’Eight?” CT-8008 opens his mouth to respond, but his tongue feels too heavy. “O’Eight…” 

“I…” CT-8008 tries, but he feels his hands start shaking, sweat forming on his palms. He knows Snap is looking at him, but he can’t pull his eyes away from the mountain. CT-8008 shuts them, hoping that will fix the terror forming in his chest. Instead he’s met with a burning city, bombs raining down like hail. He knows without thinking that this is another one of the dreams, that the vod he sees, the vod he _is_ , is the same one from all the others. 

Someone yells at him from behind a slab of concrete, waving him over. CT-8008’s feet move without his direction and he stumbles over to them. Just as he gets there an explosion goes off barely a meter from where he was. CT-8008 turns to thank the vod who called him over, but the man is pointing and shouting at something in the distance. Red and blue clash as a Jedi and a woman he recognizes as the Sith assassin Asajj Ventress clash on the rubble above them. 

“O’Eight…O’EIGHT!” CT-8008 snaps back into reality. He’s sitting in the snow, Snap kneeling above him, shaking his shoulders. Neither he, nor Snap, have their buckets on, the world crisp and white and almost too bright around them. 

“What…I--” 

“What the hell was that, O’Eight?” Snap asks, worry creasing his brow. CT -8008 looks around, head still fuzzy.

“I…I don’t know.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all for reading!!  
> Commander Bacara's description is based on ollovae3's art on tumblr (minus the face tattoo since I think clones with physical mutations such as hair or eye color would want to draw as little attention to themselves as possible, so they don't get visible tattoos)  
> Mando'a Translations:  
> vod - sibling/brother/sister, can also be used to mean "brother-in-arms"  
> vode - plural of vod


End file.
